Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Disturbing Dream

Just woke up, had another rather disturbing dream about my father. Again I was begging him not to die, again, I was crying. This time I had to run to my dads bathroom because I was so upset I felt I was going to throw up. At the end of dream I was in the bathroom on the verge of vomiting, feeling very nauseous, wailing very loudly. Through out all of this dad was sitting in the family with responding. Did I cry that much in real life? Maybe for a time but in the dreams it always seems more intense.

Not sure why the nightmares have started again but they have. I have not even begun printing the photos of my father for the AGSA exhibition yet. Maybe because I have started to receive instructions from the gallery. What is expected and when. Who the other artists in the show are, etc. Maybe seeing all of that over the last few days and thinking more of dad has reawakened the dreams.

I am sure the next year or so, while I work on the exhibition will be very intense and include many more dreams like this.

Will be posting some of that AGSA exhibition info tonight.

Update* Been thinking about the dream and past dreams. The theme of the coming exhibition is how artists deal with loss through their work. I guess for me that process is still ongoing. Heck it might be ongoing for the rest of my life, doubt I will ever stop been involved, stop dreaming of my father. I need to put some of the intensity I feel in these dreams into the photographic prints I am making for the AGSA exhibition. I have to transfer my dream feelings, my inner thoughts into the print that will be hanging on the wall.