Down

After the third grant rejection letter from the Alberta Arts people I got down, felt down, alone and fell asleep for 7 hours even thou I was not really that tired. As I slept I had a weird dream of meeting a crying Japanese women who had a broken heart, I tried to console her and we became close, then later in the dream I found out she was lying to me and using me. I woke up and thought about things, not sure what the dream was about but still felt lousy especially after I remembered the rejection letter and the Tri-x film price increases (a film I love and can no longer afford).

It is now an hour or so since I woke and I think I am over the mood swing. What have I got to whine about? I live in a beautiful country, I have people who love me,  a passion for my photography and I never go hungry. The people at the dump, have no country, live in terrible conditions with extreme poverty and yet they are friendly, compassionate and caring. Time to stop the down time and get on with making the pictures I know are important.,I need to continue to tell my stories.

I will have a meal then develop a bunch of 35mm film tonight, enough of this down time shit, I got work to do.