Dads Final Days

My father is entering the final days of his life. His breathing has become laboured at times, his speech is sometimes slurred from all the morphine, his body hurts more. Today before work I spent 30 minutes with dad, when I helped move him up in bed he was in a lot of pain. The pain seems to come and go, but the medication dosages are going up. Mom is doing a great great job with dad. We want to keep him at home as long as we can, keep him out of the palliative care hospital. Once he enters the dying hospital the quality of his life (what little he has left) will plummet.

Today I was still able to show dad a few things and get his opinions. I showed him the Journal video (which he liked) and asked his advice on the new shingles I will put on my home. I can see thou that our time together is quickly running out. I need to finish his funeral video in the next week or so, I need to work on his eulogy which I will give.

I wish there was something, anything I could do to make him feel a bit better. He is entering the suffering phase of things now. There comes a point where wanting to keep your dad alive is just being selfish. I want dad here but I do not want him to live in pain, to suffer. Hopefully tomorrow he will be a bit better. I will go down early before work and spend some more time with him again.

Soon my father will leave his family.